I will make the creature a help-mate, suitable for his needs. (Genesis 2:18)

A young couple was on the verge of ending their relationship when they went to their Pastor for counseling. The Pastor gave each one a pencil and paper. “Make a list of the things you want more than you want peace and happiness,” the Pastor told the couple.

Both individuals looked at each other, then at the blank paper. Neither was willing to list anything under that criteria.

So the Pastor asked, “What did you quarrel about yesterday?”

One said, “I want us to have a new dishwasher.”

The other said, “And I want to save some money in the bank for emergencies.”

“OK,” the Pastor responded. “Then you both have something in mind that you want more than you want peace and happiness. Write those down on the paper.”

The couple looked at each other. “We can get the dishwasher,” one conceded. “No,” the other replied, “we really do need to save money. We’ll put it in the bank.”

When two become one, sometimes it is difficult to determine, “which one.” People sometimes tend to approach relationships with the intent on changing the other person into what he or she would like them to be. The answer to “which one” really is “neither one.” Each person gives up something, almost as if it were a gift, so that they can come to oneness of understanding and the quest for common goals. When the top priority is given to harmony and peace, a lot of selfish and personal wishes get forgotten along the way.

God of peace, we pray that we will be willing to set aside our personal wishes for small things to achieve the bigger gift of peace and harmony!